The less you wear, the cheaper your groceries will be.

That’s the general rule of thumb at Haymarket, where produce is over-ripe and sellers are oversexed. In a chaste white button-up paired with short-shorts, I was the recipient of a ni hao ma, several propositions, and the best bargain I’ve ever encountered: 20 tomatoes for $2. It was enough to temporarily silence my inner feminist when the large, Italian man before me heaved, “Oh my god, oh my god, look at you.” Then he asked me where I was from and I snapped, “California.”

At regular grocery stores, I can’t afford more expensive items like berries or peppers. At Haymarket, I could obtain enough of the former to open my own fro-yo shop. Today’s loot: two pounds of mushrooms, a package of celery stalks, two packages of baby carrots, a bag of onions, 10 red peppers, and the aforementioned 20 tomatoes. Grand total: $13. I’m making two pots of pasta sauce that will last several two-person meals.

Bring cash. But not a twenty unless you’re catering a party, because $10 is already enough to get you a bushel of fruits and veggies. Literally a bushel. (Trust me, I asked a farm girl.)

Another reason to not bring twenties: you will get your change in dollar bills. Hold on to them tightly. The throngs of both tourists and locals who flock to Blackstone Street each week present a ripe opportunity for pickpockets.

Mold is not acceptable. Expect, however, for what you buy to look ugly. You will encounter misshapen peppers deemed too unsightly for suburban consumers. They are perfectly edible, even if unaesthetic. Remember, this is not a place to be a snob. Real chefs don’t shop at Haymarket, where grocery store cast-offs and rotting goods are sold for a quarter of the original price or less. They go to real farmers’ markets, like the one at Copley, which is mere steps from L’Espalier. But for young and broke home cooks like me, Haymarket is Mecca.

There are plenty of options, so don’t be hasty in settling on price or quality. The entire market is two short blocks. Browse the entire selection with wallet closed. Allow yourself to be tempted only if it appears stock is nearly out (but don’t be fooled if it’s early in the day). Show up later and you’ll get better deals as merchants attempt to unload the remaining goods — most of which won’t make it to next weekend.

Some sellers will get aggressive, even grabbing you by the arm. Others will be impatient, practically rude. Don’t take it personally. Be quick, be cordial, get in, and get out. Dwaddling and indecision are impolite.

Last piece of advice: haggling is encouraged. But if you wear a crop top, you won’t have to.