“Long before I consciously identified as a feminist, and even while I was calling myself a good Southern Baptist girl, I preferred the term ‘Ms.’ to ‘Miss’ simply because I didn’t want any part of anything that encompassed both Miss America and Little Miss Muffet.”
— Shelby Knox, “Is it ‘Miss’ or ‘Ms’? Does it Still Matter?”
Like Shelby, I cringe when a stranger calls me “Miss Chen”. It sounds infantile, even belittling, since the title strikes me as unbearably girlish. And while I have no problem copping to the fact that I am, in fact, pretty young, I’m resentful that my male friends get to be men all their lives and treated and referred to as such (with the catch-all “Mr.”), while my title depends on whether I get hitched. Sadly, I’m stuck with the “Miss” label until I’m 1) married and/or 2) wrinkly. The latter is inevitable, and the former is, well, not part of my game plan.
How do you guys feel about Ms. versus Miss? I always use “Ms.” when it comes to airline tickets and the like, but I’m fine with being called “Miss Lena” by friends. When non-acquaintances call me “Miss Chen” though, it totally rubs me the wrong way and comes off as really presumptuous. Perhaps the difference is that I know my friends have benign intentions?
Interested in the history behind the title? Refer to Shelby’s post (linked above) for a brief history lesson on the evolution of “Ms.” from its origin in the 1767 to its emergence during the second-wave as “a title for women, like Mr. for men, that was free of reference to age or marital status.”
Like Shelby, I cringe when a stranger calls me “Miss Chen”. It sounds infantile, even belittling, since the title strikes me as unbearably girlish. And while I have no problem copping to the fact that I am, in fact, pretty young, I’m resentful that my male friends get to be men all their lives and treated and referred to as such (with the catch-all “Mr.”), while my title depends on whether I get hitched. Sadly, I’m stuck with the “Miss” label until I’m 1) married and/or 2) wrinkly. The latter is inevitable, and the former is, well, not part of my game plan.
How do you guys feel about Ms. versus Miss? I always use “Ms.” when it comes to airline tickets and the like, but I’m fine with being called “Miss Lena” by friends. When non-acquaintances call me “Miss Chen” though, it totally rubs me the wrong way and comes off as really presumptuous. Perhaps the difference is that I know my friends have benign intentions?
Interested in the history behind the title? Refer to Shelby’s post (linked above) for a brief history lesson on the evolution of “Ms.” from its origin in the 1767 to its emergence during the second-wave as “a title for women, like Mr. for men, that was free of reference to age or marital status.”
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