jgh:

because mary’s post was a good thought exercise. it’s helpful to think about the cultural messages you’ve absorbed

i:

• wear makeup on occasion and get blowouts
• get highlights
• once in a blue moon, get a manicure and a pedicure
• have done a bikini wax
• despite my caterwauling against it, would probably get botox
• try to dress in stacy-and-clinton approved clothes even when not fiscally responsible
• feel anxious and uncomfortable when my weight is higher than the norm
• would probably die Freudian slip, dye my hair if it went gray
• like to spend disposable income at places like Sephora where the makeup and beauty products are tempting and overpriced

what about you?

What’s shocking to me is not how much I do but how much I spend on my appearance. If you asked me what I do on an everyday basis to maintain how I look, I don’t think I could come up with much. After all, I don’t even wear makeup unless I go out with friends (which happens about twice a month since everyone has been thesis-ing like crazy since November). However, my vanity becomes really obvious when I get my credit card statement and realize that I’ve purchased a miniskirt, sandals, and onesie in the dead of winter for no apparent reason.

That being said, I think it’s fine to spend money on how you look as long as you can afford it and are not overdoing it (going under the knife on an annual basis, for example). When I cared most about my appearance was also when I could afford to spend the least. Proportionally speaking, I used to use something like 60% of my income on beauty-related items. That’s absolutely ridiculous and not justifiable. That’s the point at which you know beauty standards have a toxic effect on people’s lives and credit scores. This is what my beauty regimen cost in 2007:

• Brazilian wax (monthly): $60
• Eyebrow wax (bimonthly): $20
• Manicure/pedicure (monthly): $35
• Haircut (bimonthly): $70
• Personal training (every week for a semester): $50/session
• Makeup and skincare (annually): anywhere between $50 and $100
• Clothes (monthly): anywhere between $50 and $300

Thanks to growing the hell up, I now make more and spend less, so it’s not as shocking to see my credit card statements. This also makes it possible for me to justify the occasional purchase of higher-priced sustainable products, because I would rather be an ethical consumer than a frugal one. (Or I could not consume at all but it’s not like I’ll be able to manufacture my own toner anytime soon). These are things I no longer pay for (as of 2008):

• Brazilians wax: I now sport a self-maintained landing strip
• Manicure/pedicure: I either do them myself or don’t get them done at all
• Personal training: my freakily athletic boyfriend doubles as a personal trainer
• Most makeup and skincare: I try to only use products I get for free
• New clothes: my clothing budget has been halved since I started shopping secondhand two years ago

As for how I feel about cosmetic procedures, my general opinion about my own body is that I would be far more comfortable with getting things taken out (not that my barely-B boobs need to get downgraded) than getting things put in. But to be perfectly honest, I find it difficult to admonish others’ decisions to get botox, etc. because I know that I will look ten years younger than everyone else at any given time since I’m Asian. If I weren’t, maybe I would be far more appalled by the possibility of wrinkles. But since I honestly just can’t relate to aging woes and don’t think I’ll be able to for at least another decade, I’m in no place to judge.