Dear Westin Grand at Washington D.C.

Why has it taken three representatives and multiple return calls to make ONE booking that isn’t even on the weekend I originally requested? Why have you completely forgotten to make a note of the free breakfast included with my visit? And how did my three-night stay suddenly turn into a two-night stay on my supposedly final itinerary? WHY WON’T YOU RETURN MY CALLS?? You are incompetent, and if I didn’t have a gift certificate for a free visit, I would say “Fuck it” to your hotel after all the hassle you’ve put me through. FAIL.

[Christine, Daniel, and all else: expect less enraged, more fabulous me in D.C. from October 10th to 13th.]