Color me impressed. A kickass Wellesley student wrote and sang the following song (set to “American Pie”) about Jeremy Pham, campus misogynist:

Not so very long ago
I can still remember
How Community used to make me frown
But this boy knew if he had the chance
That he could make the forum dance
In words and lolcats never seen before
But did he know the consequences?
Twenty-three hundred hes offended
Bad news on the doorstep;
On his part, a huge misstep
He told us it brought a tear (metaphorically) to his eye
And that hed sit back and enjoy the schadenfreude
But something touched Wellesley deep inside.
The night that feminism cried.

chorus:
So bye-bye, Mr. Jeremy bye.
Pack your things go back to Dartmouth,
You really dont need to lie.
You dont care about apologies, theres no tear in your eye
But thanks for bringing us together again
In sibling-hood together again.

Did you write the book of backtracking,
cause your apologies were really lacking,
Both the second, third, fourth and fifth times?
And will you really put a dagger in a very uncomfortable place?
And then maybe offer me a band-aid
Cause thats what you did when you shot us with a bazooka as your very first crime (thanks Shaina Lu)

And now were all gonna have a party
Thanks to the lovely lady Aarthie
Well all kick off our shoes
Man, we love that glitter glue.
And at the party well celebrate
Everything about us that you hate
And youll see apologies are too late
After that facebook post all your attempts to apologize died.

CHORUS

In ten years down the road
Youll be looking for a job somewhere in the world
And this might come back to haunt you.
This siblinghood youve brought together accidentally,
Will rise to positions of power easily,
Theyll be the people interviewing you.
Oh, and when you go back to your college town,
Remember how you let us down.
Maybe its cause youre not over five feet nine inches;
But its probably cause youre misdirecting YOUR energies.
Its nice you came to Wellesley to be our hero,
But your help is equal to absolute zero,
Cause we sure as hell dont need it, whoever told you that lied,
The night you inspired a t-shirt that will say Wellesley: 510 to ride.

CHORUS

Helter skelter in a Wellesley swelter.
A post to Community has no fallout shelter,
To your words, 4600+ eyes opened wide.
We stick to our honor code with pride.
You saw us all as mere pieces of ass,
Go take a womens and gender studies class.

Now you claim to be just a troll,
But your first post seemed to have a different goal.
You took a misogynistic stance,
Youre the one in an unacceptable trance
`cause when you tried to take back the field;
The Wellesley Siblinghood refused to yield.
Do you recall what was revealed
The night that feminism cried?

CHORUS

Oh, and there we were all in one place,
A college campus lost in flames
With no time left to start again.
So come on: pham be nimble, pham be quick!
J. Pham sat on a candlestick
And found out fires really not his friend.

Oh, and as we watched him on his rampage
Our hands were clenched in fists of rage.
And though he did raise hell
We know we broke his spell.
And as the flames climbed high into the night
To show him that he had no right,
I saw my neighbors laughing with delight
The night that that whoever admitted him into the 12-college exchange program cried.

CHORUS

I met a girl who sang the blues
And I asked her for some happy news,
She smiled and handed me a list of songs,
That reminded her of everything that had gone wrong. (Thanks Tamar!)
I went down to the dining hall, found my hunger wasnt so great
Because the sense of community I felt from reading Community was for once so satiating.

Throughout the halls: the students screamed,
Were not all whores, why cant you see.
We might call each other bad things;
But we dont even call each other THAT thing.
And the one post title I loved the most:
Im just going to say IMMA LET YOU FINISH showed
That Kanye jokes might never get old
The night that even Wellesley squirrels did face-palms.

(chorus)