August 2008
1 tag
Common Interests
Evelina: Do you need to buy anything?
Me: I need to get some new slutty dresses!
Evelina: ME TOO!
Me: This is why we're friends.
Yo, Californians!
I’m pretty sure I’m supposed to see about a million people while I’m in LA and I’m pretty sure I am too jetlagged to recall any of these social commitments. Call me, guys! My cell phone works, finally.
Also, I’m going to be in San Francisco this Saturday through Monday. I’m busy on Sunday night due to wedding obligations but I’m free to hang otherwise...
1 tag
“A relationship is a myth you create with each other. It isn’t necessarily true,...”
– What Makes Married Men Want to Have Affairs? — New York Magazine (via zoehaslife)
“The half-life of a spring roll near Lena Chen is never very long.”
– Patrick, commenting on my overconsumption of the deep-fried snack while in Southeast Asia
1 tag
Aww ... he remembers!
Me: HEY! Do you know what today is?
Patrick: The six-month anniversary of our unholy alliance?
Threadless Tees Marked Down to $9 →
Helloooo, back to school sale!
2 tags
Me: Bet you didn't expect to wind up with some whiny, needy chick! I totally pulled a bait and switch on you, didn't I?
Him: Bait and switch?
Me: You know, when car dealerships advertise one car but they're really selling another?
Him: Lena Chen, Used Car Salesman.
Me: Actually, I'm pretty sure I'm the used car in this scenario.
U! S! A!
It’s a miracle but I’m back in the land of the obese and the home of the over-stimulated. America, you’re going to get annoying in about two weeks, but goddamn do I love you right now.
1 tag
1 tag
21 hours from home
I just got off an 11-hour flight from Bangkok. I am now sitting in Frankfurt Airport, on a five-hour layover to a nine-hour flight to Philadelphia. Then I wait two hours and take six more hours to get back to LA.
Total time in airports and on planes? OVER THIRTY HOURS.
I want to shoot someone. Preferably, myself.
Or a US Airways staffer. Because right now, I’m sitting outside the check-in...
1 tag
Hello, reality.
So there’s a political uprising in Bangkok (my current destination) with questionable motives, I’ve been shielded from American entertainment for three months and therefore possess zero pop culture knowledge (kind of a blessing actually), and my 20-something-hour journey home to Los Angeles — where I haven’t been since Christmas — begins in ten hours. This is all...
List of websites that cannot be viewed by my Mac...
Sex and the Ivy The Chicktionary Twitter The New York Times Facebook LiveJournal Craigslist Mediabistro NonSociety IvyGate
I also can’t use Skype. GRR.
Pretty much all of Gawker Media, however, seems to be doing just fine. I can also access my Tumblr dashboard. My lack of Internet access is not a huge deal, since the most important thing is that I can read my email, which is easy thanks to...
december hunting for vegetarian fuckface
Um, I’m pretty sure I never said, “Don’t vote.” But in voting, one should certainly not expect Obama to be terribly different than any other U.S. president when it comes to foreign policy, if the views he’s espoused thus far are any indication. That doesn’t mean I’m rooting for McCain, but it does mean that it’s naive to get so excited about the...
Response to my last post pretty much proves my...
From: [redacted] Date: Sat, 16 Aug 2008 18:01:39 GMT Subject: To: elle@sexandtheivy.com
»The entire world hates us — rightfully so — for our interventionalist policies, preemptive wars, and general disrespect for international law.«
I find your blog most entertaining, but that statement is way, WAY over the top. Oh Lena! You sound much more like a brainwashed raving moonbat...
Why This Election Changes Nothing
The only thing progressive about Obama is that he’s black, just as the only thing progressive about Clinton was that she’s white. Basically, a Democrat taking office means nice international PR outreach, but no actual end to American imperialism which is what other countries really care about. The entire world hates us — rightfully so — for our interventionalist policies,...
Someone just yelled “G.I.!” at Patrick in Hanoi, Vietnam. I was terribly amused that he was mistaken for American and semi-horrified that the G.I. continues to be the American image here.
“Lena!!! You are finally 21 after years upon years of acting like you were 21....”
– Tara, in an email
There’s little point in celebrating your birthday when you already go to bed every night thinking that this life is more than you could have ever asked for.
1 tag
Because you're a glutton for punishment.
Ex Who Lives in D.C.: Why are you going to be in D.C.?
Me: Ex sex.
Ex Who Lives in D.C.: ... why do I ask these things?
Southeast Asia
I’ve never been to any of these countries, and now I’m spending my 21st birthday (this Wednesday) in Laos. Very excited! Here’s the itinerary:
August 11, 2008: BANGKOK, THAILAND August 12, 2008: BANGKOK, THAILAND August 13, 2008: LUANG PRABANG, LAOS August 14, 2008: HANOI, VIETNAM August 15, 2008: HALONG BAY, VIETNAM August 16, 2008: HALONG, VIETNAM August 17, 2008: HUE, VIETNAM...
We're talking about a hair appointment.
Patrick: Someone will take you.
Me: Hard. And against my will.
Patrick: You're ... ridiculous.
Job Hunting
As previously mentioned, I’m taking a year off from Harvard, which means fun things like living in an apartment instead of a dorm and working a Real Job instead of whatever it is students do. Mostly, I will freelance and write the story of my life. That tale will likely sell for something in the six-figures, despite my appalling lack of a compelling story. Gawker will then get a hold of the...
1 tag
1 tag
There are worst addictions to have.
Me (on the phone with Berryline): Hi, is it true that Berryline will be opening a second location this autumn?
Patrick: Are you looking to be employed by Berryline?
Me: What?
Patrick: Yes, your designs are that transparent.
Patrick's brother: What's Berryline?
Patrick: A frozen yogurt shop.
Me: It's for a story. Really.
"How Many Partners Makes You Promiscuous?" on...
Check out the latest Huffington Post piece by Rachel Kramer Bussel
I’m not going to tell you exactly how many people I’ve slept with, partly because I don’t know, partly because I stopped caring long ago, and partly because it’s none of your business. But I will tell you it’s more than French First Lady Carla Bruni’s reported number: 15. Way more. I share that information to make the point...
1 tag
Oops?
This morning, I got so worked up during sex (me on top) that my navel jewelry came off in the process. I found Mephisto, Patrick’s sister’s dog, pawing around the metal ball in the orgasmic afterglow.
Embarassingly enough, this has happened before — last autumn with a younger guy who attempted to fuck me while on multiple substances — and the consequence was an infection...
Liberal Arts
New acquaintance (to Patrick): I've heard many good things about you, and if I had your brain or education, I'd be --
Me: Unemployable.
2 tags
“Being single itself wasn’t so bad (and often times, it rocked), but when you...”
– “The Mating Game”, Sex and the Ivy
Clarification
Didn’t actually get dumped. I just have a weird sense of humor, obviously. But thanks for the emails!
1 tag
urtak: a new way of measuring public opinion →
Started by two friends of mine, Urtak has finally opened registration to the public. Check it out. It’s a very interesting experiment.
… In our society some voices are more equal than others, and “public opinion” is no more than the polls conducted by politicians, corporations, and entrenched interests.
Polls can be useful in measuring public opinion, but until now they...
1 tag
How To Dump A Blogger
Patrick: I'm generally a very private person, and hopefully this fall, I'll finally get some peace and quiet.
Me: Are you breaking up with me?
1 tag
Find a girlfriend your own species.
Hamlet will not stop sniffing between my legs! It is driving me crazy. I cannot write like this.